My agent got me a last-minute deal
So now I’m happy to reveal:
“It was always my boyhood dream
To play for [insert name of team]”

I’ll say I supported them as a kid.
I’ll kiss the badge for a few extra quid.
“Rival offers? I cast them aside
To play for [insert name of side]”

And when the window opens next,
To my advisors I’ll send this text:
“A lucrative move I wouldn’t snub
To leave for [insert name of club]”