There is a football tournament on, you may have noticed. And at times like this my thoughts turn to music, obviously.

Now there are two types of football song – those made by Half Man Half Biscuit and those that aren’t. So here are two playlists representing each category. First, the Wirrall geniuses at work:

Friday Nights And The Gates Are Low
1966 And All That
I Was A Teenage Armchair Honved Fan
Even Men With Steel Hearts
Dead Men Don’t Need Season Tickets
Mathematically Safe
Gubba Lookalikes
Bob Wilson, Anchorman
The Referee’s Alphabet
All I Want For Christmas Is A Dulka Prague Away Kit

And now for the rest of humanity to respond:

Three English Football Grounds – I, Ludicrous
Give Him A Ball – Sultans Of Ping
The Man Don’t Give A Fuck – Super Furry Animals
Kicker Conspiracy – The Fall
Theme From Sparta FC – The Fall
We’ll Let You Know – Morrissey
Goals In Slow Motion – Future Of The Left
Fussball – The Orb ft Lee Scratch Perry
I Was A Goalkeeper – John MOuse
Fell Off The Penalty Spotty Spot – Forkeyes

And that’s as much as I’m saying about football this summer.